If you have a wicked sense of humour and enjoy causing little confusion, you are in the right place. Here are some of the best ways to subtly irritate and confuse others, brainstormed by the internet.
Nine ways to subtly mess with people
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"When I order food and they ask for my name, I read the name off of their nametag."
"Sometimes I subtly mispronounce words (like mikerwave for microwave, or ass cream for ice cream) and when people give me a weird look or ask me to repeat myself, I pronounce the word correctly."
"When I'm on the ground floor and someone else gets in the elevator, I ask if they are also going down. Same goes for if I'm on the top floor, I ask if they are going up. It's fun to watch them get monetarily confused as they forget how many floors the building has."
"Whenever my siblings ask me a question, I repeat it while emphasising certain words with a puzzled expression. They falter and repeat the question to themselves to see if it makes sense."
"I ask for a slice of paper."
"Spelling people’s names as outlandishly as possible on their coffee cup. Jennifer? No, you’re Genipher today, Allen? No sir, Al N. Ryan? Nope, try Ryeanne on for size. Chris? naw, Kris. Sarah? Nope, Sareuh."
"I like to make sure the person at a drive-through window knows that my order is to go. I also order diet water sometimes."
''Another fun one goes like this, I’m not a psychologist but I don’t think your arm is supposed to be bent like that. Just use whatever version of -ologist with some completely unrelated."
"I'll put things on a scale of 0 to 10, except I don't, and I keep talking. For instance: "On a scale of 0 to 10, this ice cream is delicious".