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Ripper dad jokes get a laugh


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Here's my pick of some of the best dad jokes on the internet, in honour of Father's Day.

1. “What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.”

2. “A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, ‘First offender?’ She says, ‘No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!’”

3. “5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.”

4. “What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1”

5. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!

6. "Last night I dreamt I was a muffler. I woke up exhausted!''

7. "What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in front of your door? Matt." 

8. "What do you call a man with no arms and no legs wiggling in a pile of leaves? Russel."

9. 'Waitress: careful, that plate is hot!'  Dad: 'It's ok, so am I.'

10. What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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